Emotional Moves: how to cope with moving home

"No matter how much you move, you still take yourself with you." ~ Elizabeth Stirling, Psychologist specialising in life changes.

Moving home is always a stressful exercise - and it doesn't matter if you've been in the current home for a long time or not. Wherever you have set down roots, there is an attachment of sorts. But moving from a well-loved home is probably one of the most emotional upheavals one can experience.

It has been likened to grieving over the loss of a loved one or beloved pet. There is a psychological process that can help with coming to terms with change and a sense of loss that may accompany a move.

Moving emotions

Moving house is sometimes forced upon us, whether we are moving for career sake or financial reasons or change of lifestyle, we need to find a way to be as psychologically prepared as we can. Understanding this, and responding positively to it, is half the battle.

• There is so much to think about it can be daunting. So many details to be taken care of, money issues to be signed and sorted, and many challenges and changes to be dealt with in a short space of time. When you are faced with this, remember it is only natural to feel overwhelmed, depressed and confused.
• Possibly, your biggest sadness will be saying goodbye to a valued and loved home. Happy moments, tragic losses, significant events, romantic, heart-breaking, or life-changing experiences are all registered here, locked into the very walls so to speak. But allow yourself time to grieve, and build on thoughts of the still to be explored potential of your new home.
• View the move as a transition to a new environment, a new way of life. The moment we view the move as something exciting, something that will broaden our experience, we can begin to put a positive spin on the move.
• Memories make up so much of our lives, we often feel that when we leave a place we are leaving some of our life behind. But memories will always travel with you. Everything that you value about the home you are leaving will still remain valued in the mind. And sometimes we are leaving elements of little value behind, clearing out the mind so to speak. And that also has value.
• Look forward to meeting new friends and connections in your new area. This doesn't mean you are leaving old friends behind and forgotten, but merely that you are expanding your network of acquaintances, support and interest groups. View your move as an opportunity to make new memories and grow as a person.
• Packing up a house can be sad in many ways. As you pack you will review items that you have collected over your life and which are part of your home. You may not be able to take everything with you, and will have to choose; this can be difficult. But often a clear out of old items cleans out the memories, and can be of major psychological value.

Working a positive vibe

• Plan your move well in advance. Prepare lists and organise removers, pay accounts and ensure you have all the necessary documents in place. Make a precise calendar of dates for managing the move, and set up an efficient moving budget.
• Having backup when you move can be really helpful. Involving family and friends can be fun and exciting. Invite your friends around as soon as possible to enjoy your new home.
• Get out and get to know your new environment. Talk to your new neighbours, find out what options there are in your area for services, activity groups, restaurants, sports and leisure activities.
• If you are moving to a new job, research all the services you will need in your new area: a good doctor, a good school for your children, and reliable service providers in all ranges of needs.
• Make a list of the good things that will result from the move, as well as a list of things that might present a problem, so you are ready to tackle these with focus and intention.
• Take time out during the move. This will help to replenish your energy stores, as well as prevent build-up of negative emotions.
• Unpack as quickly as you can, putting your familiar things around you, creating a sense of home as soon as you can.

If you prepare yourself ahead of the move, and give yourself time to process all the emotions, you can find the strength, resolve, and positive outlook necessary to make a good move. This is the chance to create the home of your dreams, and also to change anything you didn't like in your previous life; a key time to explore your prospects, and create a better life for yourself.

Leapfrog Property Group

Leapfrog Property Group offers a fresh and innovative approach to buying, selling, renting and property investments, ensuring the best property deals for clients across South Africa. Our agents are qualified, trained, experienced; our approach bold and spirited, driven by heart, generosity and honesty. It is our mission to advise,  eliminate obstacles and save you unnecessary expense. Trust is our watchword. And value our motto. Armed with our combined credentials, we are the bright face of excellence in the South African market.